I have seen countless deaths up close, deaths of people close to me as well as deaths of people I did not know from Adam. I also have been consoled and consoled others too by thoughts that say death is not the end, that death is just the beginning of true life, and so forth. But just the same, like many of you, I suppose, I struggle whenever I hear or read about the dying of a young man or woman who is so full of life and so promising. I struggle because death in this case all seems so senseless and meaningless to me.
The other day, the newspapers and television carried the story of Kennely Ann Binay, a 29 year-old young mother who ironically lost her life in the process of giving life to her fourth child, a baby girl. She had other children age 6, 3, and 1 year-old. This young woman, prior to this chapter in her life, probably was the envy of her peers. She was married to the scion of a powerful and wealthy political family; she had three beautiful children; she was lovely and glamorous. In a sense, she was definitely living a full life and death probably never was in her horizon.
Sometime ago, I was again disturbed by what I thought was the senseless death of another young woman, Tara Santelices. She was only in her early twenties, a recent graduate of Ateneo de Manila University and just like any young graduate of her age was dreaming of a bright future ahead of her. She was a member of a band and was aspiring to go to Law school someday. What also makes her case so disturbing to me was the way she died. She was shot in the head when she refused to turn in her bag during a robbery-holdup on the eve of her birthday. She was brought to a hospital and went into a coma for several months. Upon waking up, her family brought her home and lovingly cared for her until her vital organs finally failed.
Not so long ago, there was the case of Amiel Alcantara, a Grade four pupil of the Ateneo Grade School who lost his life in a school accident. He was hit fatally by a vehicle driven by the mother of another Grade School student during dismissal time. The boy was the joy of his parents and siblings who were completely overcome by grief. Their son and brother was so promising, intelligent, and so full of life always wanting to play outdoors. But a freak accident took him away from them. The accident changed the lives of two families forever – the family of Amiel and the family of the mother-driver who hit Amiel.
I have been asking questions like Why? How could death be so cruel, so unreasonable?
Sometimes God answers us as we go through the ordinary routine of our lives. I found the answer this morning from the online column of the eminent Oblate Spiritual writer Father Ronald Rolheiser.
He was actually writing about the stories of two extraordinary women. On the first, he quoted from the book of Paula D’Arcy: “A woman… lost a son in an accident. Some years later someone was commenting on how hard this must be for her, not to get to watch her son grow up and marry and not to ever get to hold her grandchildren. Her response: "I don't think in those terms. The answer is that I don't know. I don't know what his life should have been. I realize today that his soul had its own journey and its own terms with life. This had nothing to do with me. But I got to participate for a while in the journey of that soul. For that I am unspeakably grateful."
I was struck especially by the woman’s response that I thought was the answer to my questions: “I don’t know. I don’t know what his (her) life should have been. I realize today that his/her soul had its own journey and its own terms with life.”
I also thought that the loved ones left by Kennely Ann, Tara, and Amiel, as well as the rest of us, can find meaning in what the woman said in the end: “This had nothing to do with me. But I got to participate for a while in the journey of that soul. For that I am unspeakably grateful.”
The other day, the newspapers and television carried the story of Kennely Ann Binay, a 29 year-old young mother who ironically lost her life in the process of giving life to her fourth child, a baby girl. She had other children age 6, 3, and 1 year-old. This young woman, prior to this chapter in her life, probably was the envy of her peers. She was married to the scion of a powerful and wealthy political family; she had three beautiful children; she was lovely and glamorous. In a sense, she was definitely living a full life and death probably never was in her horizon.
Sometime ago, I was again disturbed by what I thought was the senseless death of another young woman, Tara Santelices. She was only in her early twenties, a recent graduate of Ateneo de Manila University and just like any young graduate of her age was dreaming of a bright future ahead of her. She was a member of a band and was aspiring to go to Law school someday. What also makes her case so disturbing to me was the way she died. She was shot in the head when she refused to turn in her bag during a robbery-holdup on the eve of her birthday. She was brought to a hospital and went into a coma for several months. Upon waking up, her family brought her home and lovingly cared for her until her vital organs finally failed.
Not so long ago, there was the case of Amiel Alcantara, a Grade four pupil of the Ateneo Grade School who lost his life in a school accident. He was hit fatally by a vehicle driven by the mother of another Grade School student during dismissal time. The boy was the joy of his parents and siblings who were completely overcome by grief. Their son and brother was so promising, intelligent, and so full of life always wanting to play outdoors. But a freak accident took him away from them. The accident changed the lives of two families forever – the family of Amiel and the family of the mother-driver who hit Amiel.
I have been asking questions like Why? How could death be so cruel, so unreasonable?
Sometimes God answers us as we go through the ordinary routine of our lives. I found the answer this morning from the online column of the eminent Oblate Spiritual writer Father Ronald Rolheiser.
He was actually writing about the stories of two extraordinary women. On the first, he quoted from the book of Paula D’Arcy: “A woman… lost a son in an accident. Some years later someone was commenting on how hard this must be for her, not to get to watch her son grow up and marry and not to ever get to hold her grandchildren. Her response: "I don't think in those terms. The answer is that I don't know. I don't know what his life should have been. I realize today that his soul had its own journey and its own terms with life. This had nothing to do with me. But I got to participate for a while in the journey of that soul. For that I am unspeakably grateful."
I was struck especially by the woman’s response that I thought was the answer to my questions: “I don’t know. I don’t know what his (her) life should have been. I realize today that his/her soul had its own journey and its own terms with life.”
I also thought that the loved ones left by Kennely Ann, Tara, and Amiel, as well as the rest of us, can find meaning in what the woman said in the end: “This had nothing to do with me. But I got to participate for a while in the journey of that soul. For that I am unspeakably grateful.”
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